No, all of the angels in Paradiso are the same, normal way. I...
( He pauses initially because he doesn't feel like he should keep going. But then, something hits him, and he turns to stare at Azula. Despite her cough, he's noticed something. )
[Oh, good. Which thing should she tell him, that she was trying to learn his strengths and weaknesses as a potential useful asset or that she was trying to assess how much of a threat he was in case she had to fight him? Which would be least awful? Of all the infuriating, insufferable slips she could have made-]
Since arriving here, I've made it my business to study new concepts and ideas when I encounter them. It's how I mastered the technology so quickly.
[...not technically a lie, and she even manages to keep the defensiveness out of her voice.]
Besides, what does it matter? You can clearly hide them anyway.
( Right... That makes sense. It would be silly to think she had any specific interest or care for him, after all. He hums in his thought as he nods along, seeming satisfied with the answer. His left hand pauses on the railing of the stairway, and he stares at the scarred back of it. )
I was told to never open them up again.
( How much does he really want to go into this? How much can he? With a human, especially. He takes his steps up, sighing. )
My wings, I mean. The eyes and stuff are kind of part of that, though. They're weird, and I'm afraid that people who see them are going to hate me for it.
[There's a surprising flare of anger inside her at that. Something about it just sticks in her like a thorn. She can't even identify why, exactly, but it's infuriating.]
Who told you that, and why?
[It comes out slightly more demanding than she meant it to, and she takes a moment to breathe. And suppresses the cough that comes with it.]
Whoever it was, I assume they're not here, so what they want from you is irrelevant.
( He pauses at the door to his room, fingers on the handle as he glances back to Azula. )
...Do you want to come in for a while?
( He's trying to determine if he should keep explaining or not. But he definitely can't do it out in the hallway. If she wants to go her own way, though... )
[She pauses at that. Was he... offering to tell her more? It was the only reason she could think of for him to bring her to a private place, and this was clearly painful for him.
"She was right, of course-"
Not helpful.
Of course she should learn what she could about him, she'd decided he was a valuable asset, and she finds him tolerable company, anyway. Apparently those traits were rare enough for her to run into a fire like a fool to save the pathetic idiot.
Not. Helpful. Though that did remind her.]
Your foolish stunt earlier seems to have burnt your hand, apparently that ridiculous plant you gave me might help. I'll be right back.
[Not precisely an answer, but it's fine. The 'yes' is implied.]
( He forgot about his hand. He flips it over now, glancing at the blistering on his palm. It hurts, sure... But more of the pain had come from memories associated with the burning and pain on the left side of his body. )
I'll leave the door unlocked.
( So, he enters his apartment and decides to move to the single couch he's managed to acquire. He sits on it and folds his arms over his knees as he leans forward, staring at his burnt hand and thinking.
Should he really be saying any more? His heart aches at the thought of it. )
[It doesn't take long for her to return, the aloe- repotted into something a little sturdier and more decorative, apparently she was willing to invest in that much- in one hand, and a small paring knife in the other.
She walks into Shealtiel's apartment without a word, shoving the door closed behind her with her foot, and immediately heads over to place it in his window, slowly turning it as if contemplating something.]
Ignore what I'm doing, you can say whatever you were planning to say.
[See, she even phrased it as a suggestion! Admittedly a rather sharp, demanding one, but hey, progress.
After a little more contemplation, she finally selects one of the outer leaves and cuts it from the plant with a single swipe of the knife, then takes both the leaf and the knife over to the sink.]
( He notices the plant is in a new pot, a little taller, a little happier. It makes him happy to see it, too. Even he can understand Azula must have cared for it some amount. But he can't manage a smile when he's feeling this nervous, and it's probably for the best he doesn't anyway.
He tries to fidget with his hands like usual, but the pinch on his burnt skin earns a hiss, and he forces his hands away from each other. Ugh. )
My manager was the one who took me in. I was abandoned when I was born and left with humans at a church... And any time I saw angels, they left before making any contact with me. But he found me and didn't leave me there. I think if any of the other angels had found me, they probably would have killed me. He said so, too.
My manager is the one who gave me his spear, the one who raised me, and helped me blend in with the other angels. He helped fake records, taught me the history with books, and told me how to fit in.
[That made it sound like the order- to hide his abnormalities- was for his own protection, then. But if these other angels were so dangerous and hostile, why would anybody want to expose him to that danger?
"If people find out you've been to see Uncle, they'll think you're plotting with him."
The memory breaks her concentration, and the knife slips from where it's tucked under her thumb and clatters into the sink. Rrgh. Stop it, Azula. Focus. She sets the knife aside rather than try to hold it again, then resumes washing the leaf.]
Why would these angels care about something as trivial as your eyes?
[Sent on an impossible mission to keep him away. Now, didn't that sound familiar? Then again, how had Zuko gotten burned? Foolish sentiment overriding common sense? Trying to help?
No. He's not Zuko. He's nothing like Zuko. Rrgh. Why can she not just focus? You've got to wash your stupid cactus leaf so you can treat his stupid burn, that's all. Pull it together.
She does notice how his hand traces his scars when he speaks of being cleansed. That... ah. Another rush of unexpected anger goes through her at that, but she ignores it.]
Perhaps he simply had confidence in your ability to fend for yourself.
[It was a lie. She was certain he was correct- that this 'manager,' who had taken it on himself to force Shealtiel into that position that was so dangerous for him, tired of the burden he'd created. Arrogant fool.
She retrieves the knife. Fortunately, it was topical, she didn't need to drain the aloin. She finds the cleanest cloth or paper towel she can find to pat the leaf dry, and then begins slicing it with quick, precise movements, peeling back the skin from the leaf.]
...I've failed every mission to kill a demon. I haven't killed a single one.
( He notices her weird clumsiness through all of this, and his eyes do lift to watch her for a moment. But he looks tired, and doesn't remark on it. Of course he wouldn't. Shealtiel feels like he understands Azula at least... in some ways. And it's interesting, watching it like that.
But he knows it would be cruel and unnecessary to point anything out when she's only helping him. )
So sending me to try and kill the Prince of demons and his guardian would be a weird thing to have confidence in me for.
[And that sounded exactly like sending Zuko to find the Avatar that nobody had seen in a hundred years.
It was... odd, seeing it from this perspective, and it dredges up a lot of unpleasant thoughts and confusing emotions that she's been trying very hard not to think about. So she opts, instead, to focus on slicing the pulp of the leaf into thin strips, and it takes her slightly too-long to respond.]
Did you succeed?
[She finishes with the knife, sets it aside, and carries the aloe strips over to Shealtiel.]
Hand.
[It's not quite as harsh as her usual demanding tone, but apparently that's still as polite a... request...? as he's going to get.]
...No. My angelic weapon doesn't work on him because he has an angelic weapon, too. His guardian gave him one he must have stolen from a deceased angel.
( Shealtiel says all of this tiredly, quietly offering his burnt hand forward. It's bubbled and blistered in spots where his grip had been the most firm, with all of his skin looking quite angry. It makes the scarred back of the same hand look almost nice in comparison. )
And... He's different. He actually treats me nicely, even after seeing my wings. I don't really get why, but it seems like he wants to be friends.
[With her left hand, she grips the scarred back of his hand firmly, almost uncomfortably tightly. With the right, she presses a flat strip of aloe against his palm with a surprisingly gentle touch, lightly rubbing it over the burns to coat it in the aloe that weeps from the freshly cut plant flesh.]
If he's not an angel, why should he care if your wings are imperfect? Honestly, it sounds to me like your allegiance is to the wrong people.
["Well, look at this. Enemies and traitors all working together."
No. He's not-
Her hands shake, and she scowls and steadies them again.]
( Shealtiel winces slightly at both the hold and the application, but it’s more because of the conversation, honestly. It’s making his whole left side burn, and Azula’s insinuation sparks something like fear in him. He practically snarls as he spits out a quick reply. )
What would you know?
( But unlike other instances, he’s quick to relent, breathing a sigh out slowly through his teeth as his eyebrows furrow. He looks bothered, uncomfortable, and afraid. )
…I can’t explain everything I’m dealing with right now, but if I’m not supposed to… be with angels, then everything I dealt with in my past would be pointless.
I can’t believe that… It can’t have been for nothing.
I shouldn’t have started rambling about this. It’s my problem to sort out.
[Ah, good, petulant outrage, because there weren't enough reminders of Zuko in this conversation. Still, the reaction... surprises her.
It makes no sense. He makes no sense.
She says nothing, she just continues applying the gelatinous ooze from the plant to his burns, ignoring his winces of pain- a fortunate side effect of being a monster, she supposes. This is for his own good, after all. Finally, she pulls the stripped leaf away and lets go of his hand, moving to throw the spent strip of aloe flesh away.
Hopefully that would at least soothe the pain now that she was done, not that she particularly cared at this point. Of course he didn't trust her, it was one of the first intelligent choices he'd ever made. No matter how irrational he was being. Why did this bother her so much? Why did she care if the pathetic fool was so blindly loyal to these people who didn't care about him? It was his own stupid choice, after all.
( He doesn’t know why she doesn’t react to any of his comments, and the seeds of fear already planted inside of him begin to sprout. Shealtiel shifts his hand over to look at the applied substance, already noting the slight soothing sensation beneath the stings.
Even that plant is more useful than him. His frown deepens, and as he lowers his hands back to his lap and sits up a little more, he swallows hard. )
Azula, are you mad at me?
( The way he asks is terribly small and pathetic, like a child. He barely forces himself to make eye contact, and his eyes, though there are only two of them now, manage to look almost like a puppy’s. )
[... That wasn't at all the question she'd expected, and she meets his eyes for a few silent moments, finally breaking eye contact as she responds.]
Don't be ridiculous. You're the one who snapped, remember?
[And there it was again. She hadn't even had to say anything. Making people miserable, driving them away, again, like always, even when she was trying to-
She wasn't sure what she was trying to do, actually. Treat his injuries, she supposes. Make them even. Whatever it was, she'd failed at it. She used to be good at things before she came to this awful city. Now, even when she's trying to help, all she can manage to do is hurt and frighten people.
Monster.
Rrgh. And this fool thought he was a- she was right there, he should be able to see the difference, the useless idiot.]
( He snaps that out, then pauses, realizing his own mistake and pursing his lips slightly over it. )
Okay, maybe I snapped a little.
( It's a muttered admission, but it's one all the same, even as he's wringing his fingers together in his own lap. )
I'm tired of people telling me what I should or shouldn't want. I just need... time. To decide for myself. ( He's clearly lost in some sort of thought, finding it difficult to look back at her. )
[Diffident again, but rather than frustration she feels relief again.]
You were telling me about angels.
[Or, rather, how the angels were preying on him for their own purposes, and he was foolishly loyal to them-
"Father... regrets? He... wants me back?" She heard the surprise, the aching hope in her brother's voice, and she kept the smirk of satisfaction from reaching her face-
Azula suddenly shuts the water off, a little more forcefully than she needs to and wheels to face him, keeping her expression carefully neutral again.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2022-10-04 04:45 am (UTC)( He pauses initially because he doesn't feel like he should keep going. But then, something hits him, and he turns to stare at Azula. Despite her cough, he's noticed something. )
Wait, you've read up on angels?
( He just seems genuinely surprised. )
no subject
Date: 2022-10-04 05:15 am (UTC)Since arriving here, I've made it my business to study new concepts and ideas when I encounter them. It's how I mastered the technology so quickly.
[...not technically a lie, and she even manages to keep the defensiveness out of her voice.]
Besides, what does it matter? You can clearly hide them anyway.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 12:52 am (UTC)I was told to never open them up again.
( How much does he really want to go into this? How much can he? With a human, especially. He takes his steps up, sighing. )
My wings, I mean. The eyes and stuff are kind of part of that, though. They're weird, and I'm afraid that people who see them are going to hate me for it.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 02:48 am (UTC)Who told you that, and why?
[It comes out slightly more demanding than she meant it to, and she takes a moment to breathe. And suppresses the cough that comes with it.]
Whoever it was, I assume they're not here, so what they want from you is irrelevant.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 03:29 am (UTC)( He pauses at the door to his room, fingers on the handle as he glances back to Azula. )
...Do you want to come in for a while?
( He's trying to determine if he should keep explaining or not. But he definitely can't do it out in the hallway. If she wants to go her own way, though... )
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 03:49 am (UTC)"She was right, of course-"
Not helpful.
Of course she should learn what she could about him, she'd decided he was a valuable asset, and she finds him tolerable company, anyway. Apparently those traits were rare enough for her to run into a fire like a fool to save the pathetic idiot.
Not. Helpful. Though that did remind her.]
Your foolish stunt earlier seems to have burnt your hand, apparently that ridiculous plant you gave me might help. I'll be right back.
[Not precisely an answer, but it's fine. The 'yes' is implied.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 04:08 am (UTC)( He forgot about his hand. He flips it over now, glancing at the blistering on his palm. It hurts, sure... But more of the pain had come from memories associated with the burning and pain on the left side of his body. )
I'll leave the door unlocked.
( So, he enters his apartment and decides to move to the single couch he's managed to acquire. He sits on it and folds his arms over his knees as he leans forward, staring at his burnt hand and thinking.
Should he really be saying any more? His heart aches at the thought of it. )
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 04:59 am (UTC)She walks into Shealtiel's apartment without a word, shoving the door closed behind her with her foot, and immediately heads over to place it in his window, slowly turning it as if contemplating something.]
Ignore what I'm doing, you can say whatever you were planning to say.
[See, she even phrased it as a suggestion! Admittedly a rather sharp, demanding one, but hey, progress.
After a little more contemplation, she finally selects one of the outer leaves and cuts it from the plant with a single swipe of the knife, then takes both the leaf and the knife over to the sink.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 05:21 am (UTC)( He notices the plant is in a new pot, a little taller, a little happier. It makes him happy to see it, too. Even he can understand Azula must have cared for it some amount. But he can't manage a smile when he's feeling this nervous, and it's probably for the best he doesn't anyway.
He tries to fidget with his hands like usual, but the pinch on his burnt skin earns a hiss, and he forces his hands away from each other. Ugh. )
My manager was the one who took me in. I was abandoned when I was born and left with humans at a church... And any time I saw angels, they left before making any contact with me. But he found me and didn't leave me there. I think if any of the other angels had found me, they probably would have killed me. He said so, too.
My manager is the one who gave me his spear, the one who raised me, and helped me blend in with the other angels. He helped fake records, taught me the history with books, and told me how to fit in.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 05:36 am (UTC)"If people find out you've been to see Uncle, they'll think you're plotting with him."
The memory breaks her concentration, and the knife slips from where it's tucked under her thumb and clatters into the sink. Rrgh. Stop it, Azula. Focus. She sets the knife aside rather than try to hold it again, then resumes washing the leaf.]
Why would these angels care about something as trivial as your eyes?
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 05:40 am (UTC)( His fingers trace very lightly over the back of his left hand, now. No burns there, but leftover scars. )
He thought that the upper choir would want to know about me, and was trying to hide that.
( He sighs again. )
It doesn't matter now. He sent me on an impossible mission to keep me away, and now I can't go back. I think he probably got tired of caring for me.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-07 05:56 am (UTC)No. He's not Zuko. He's nothing like Zuko. Rrgh. Why can she not just focus? You've got to wash your stupid cactus leaf so you can treat his stupid burn, that's all. Pull it together.
She does notice how his hand traces his scars when he speaks of being cleansed. That... ah. Another rush of unexpected anger goes through her at that, but she ignores it.]
Perhaps he simply had confidence in your ability to fend for yourself.
[It was a lie. She was certain he was correct- that this 'manager,' who had taken it on himself to force Shealtiel into that position that was so dangerous for him, tired of the burden he'd created. Arrogant fool.
She retrieves the knife. Fortunately, it was topical, she didn't need to drain the aloin. She finds the cleanest cloth or paper towel she can find to pat the leaf dry, and then begins slicing it with quick, precise movements, peeling back the skin from the leaf.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-08 03:40 am (UTC)( He notices her weird clumsiness through all of this, and his eyes do lift to watch her for a moment. But he looks tired, and doesn't remark on it. Of course he wouldn't. Shealtiel feels like he understands Azula at least... in some ways. And it's interesting, watching it like that.
But he knows it would be cruel and unnecessary to point anything out when she's only helping him. )
So sending me to try and kill the Prince of demons and his guardian would be a weird thing to have confidence in me for.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-08 08:47 am (UTC)It was... odd, seeing it from this perspective, and it dredges up a lot of unpleasant thoughts and confusing emotions that she's been trying very hard not to think about. So she opts, instead, to focus on slicing the pulp of the leaf into thin strips, and it takes her slightly too-long to respond.]
Did you succeed?
[She finishes with the knife, sets it aside, and carries the aloe strips over to Shealtiel.]
Hand.
[It's not quite as harsh as her usual demanding tone, but apparently that's still as polite a... request...? as he's going to get.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 04:17 am (UTC)( Shealtiel says all of this tiredly, quietly offering his burnt hand forward. It's bubbled and blistered in spots where his grip had been the most firm, with all of his skin looking quite angry. It makes the scarred back of the same hand look almost nice in comparison. )
And... He's different. He actually treats me nicely, even after seeing my wings. I don't really get why, but it seems like he wants to be friends.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 04:32 am (UTC)If he's not an angel, why should he care if your wings are imperfect? Honestly, it sounds to me like your allegiance is to the wrong people.
["Well, look at this. Enemies and traitors all working together."
No. He's not-
Her hands shake, and she scowls and steadies them again.]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 05:17 am (UTC)What would you know?
( But unlike other instances, he’s quick to relent, breathing a sigh out slowly through his teeth as his eyebrows furrow. He looks bothered, uncomfortable, and afraid. )
…I can’t explain everything I’m dealing with right now, but if I’m not supposed to… be with angels, then everything I dealt with in my past would be pointless.
I can’t believe that… It can’t have been for nothing.
I shouldn’t have started rambling about this. It’s my problem to sort out.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 05:27 am (UTC)It makes no sense. He makes no sense.
She says nothing, she just continues applying the gelatinous ooze from the plant to his burns, ignoring his winces of pain- a fortunate side effect of being a monster, she supposes. This is for his own good, after all. Finally, she pulls the stripped leaf away and lets go of his hand, moving to throw the spent strip of aloe flesh away.
Hopefully that would at least soothe the pain now that she was done, not that she particularly cared at this point. Of course he didn't trust her, it was one of the first intelligent choices he'd ever made. No matter how irrational he was being. Why did this bother her so much? Why did she care if the pathetic fool was so blindly loyal to these people who didn't care about him? It was his own stupid choice, after all.
Finally, she mutters,]
Were there any more burns?
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 05:37 am (UTC)( He doesn’t know why she doesn’t react to any of his comments, and the seeds of fear already planted inside of him begin to sprout. Shealtiel shifts his hand over to look at the applied substance, already noting the slight soothing sensation beneath the stings.
Even that plant is more useful than him. His frown deepens, and as he lowers his hands back to his lap and sits up a little more, he swallows hard. )
Azula, are you mad at me?
( The way he asks is terribly small and pathetic, like a child. He barely forces himself to make eye contact, and his eyes, though there are only two of them now, manage to look almost like a puppy’s. )
no subject
Date: 2022-10-10 06:02 am (UTC)Don't be ridiculous. You're the one who snapped, remember?
[And there it was again. She hadn't even had to say anything. Making people miserable, driving them away, again, like always, even when she was trying to-
She wasn't sure what she was trying to do, actually. Treat his injuries, she supposes. Make them even. Whatever it was, she'd failed at it. She used to be good at things before she came to this awful city. Now, even when she's trying to help, all she can manage to do is hurt and frighten people.
Monster.
Rrgh. And this fool thought he was a- she was right there, he should be able to see the difference, the useless idiot.]
no subject
Date: 2022-12-23 05:13 am (UTC)( He snaps that out, then pauses, realizing his own mistake and pursing his lips slightly over it. )
Okay, maybe I snapped a little.
( It's a muttered admission, but it's one all the same, even as he's wringing his fingers together in his own lap. )
I'm tired of people telling me what I should or shouldn't want. I just need... time. To decide for myself. ( He's clearly lost in some sort of thought, finding it difficult to look back at her. )
You seemed angry about me running in there.
no subject
Date: 2022-12-23 07:19 am (UTC)[... Oops. Okay, too harsh. She moderates the tone a bit as she disposes of the remaining slices of aloe.]
Rushing into a burning building just to save one person, with no plan and no equipment? Of course I was annoyed.
no subject
Date: 2023-01-03 06:20 am (UTC)Didn't you do the same thing to save me, though?
( At least it makes his hands relax in his lap after all the fidgeting. )
no subject
Date: 2023-01-03 07:08 am (UTC)And then she goes and begins washing her hands, speaking in a more typically neutral tone.]
I can control fire. I don't need equipment, and I had a plan.
[...which would have sounded a lot more convincing if the last word hadn't come out in a slightly raspy hiss that nearly ended in another cough.]
no subject
Date: 2023-01-03 07:43 am (UTC)R-right! What I said was that it was completely different, haha...
( Ahem. Clearing his throat, and coughing a little more from it, he stands, moving to see how Azula is doing at this point. )
Anyway... I think I got a little off track of everything.
no subject
Date: 2023-01-03 08:02 am (UTC)You were telling me about angels.
[Or, rather, how the angels were preying on him for their own purposes, and he was foolishly loyal to them-
"Father... regrets? He... wants me back?" She heard the surprise, the aching hope in her brother's voice, and she kept the smirk of satisfaction from reaching her face-
Azula suddenly shuts the water off, a little more forcefully than she needs to and wheels to face him, keeping her expression carefully neutral again.]